I feel like a mororn. Maybe I am one. This is bound to happen when I mix things up my own special way. I should know. Happens to me all the time in real life.
Pondering on the reason for one's existence is hardly the sort of thing one ought to be doing these days. But, there being nothing really worthwhile about life, about being alive, or even about feeling alive, this is just the kind of futile occupation that appeals to loner's of my sort. So here I am, by my favourite watering hole, listening to the silence of eons. Maybe I am weird, like some nice people have kindly pointed out. What they have not been able to point out though, is the reason for my weirdness or anybody elses weirdness. I guess, sitting by all by oneself, by the side of a sullen lake is weird. Fine. So I am a weird loner. Thank you very much. That is what loners are ! Anyway, I haven't posted anything at all for a long time. Even my best friends seem to have given up on me. It is tough being a loner. It is tougher being a weird loner.
Comments
No, I dont have a blog actually ^^;. I'm fully capable of rambling as you've seen, but with out a given direction, I usually abstian from doing so as my head wonders anywhere and everywhere on any given day..... By the time I got done writing about everything I could, itd be a week later, and if I only chose bits and pieces, that would seem unfair to everything else. "Why should I choose to display only certain parts of myself to a world that may or may not care to see it, if I can't do it in a full and complete way", I suppose is my unbidden thought on that, and it probably doesnt make much sense to all here, but its just part of who I am..... I've always been of the opinion that, if someone really wants to know me, its much more time effective, and simpler, to just ask me whatever they want to know. And besides, I usually prefer to listen in most situations in life..... Only when I think I can say something someone might appreciate, or be able to use, or find applicable, do I say anything at all (Unless I'm asked of course).....
Have you taken an MBTI test? I believe the full name is "Meyers-Briggs Personality Type Indicator Test". There are a great many Introverts out there, and not all of them are Loners. Of course, not all Loners are Introverts either, but it has been my experience that *Usually* if someone is one, they are the other. The difference between an Introvert and an Extrovert is really wether a person just feels better Alone, or Surrounded by people most of the time, and there are of course whole lists of traits that the stereotype of each will portray (For instance the stereotypical Introvert usually is a Loner), but there are exceptions to every rule in life (At least as far as humans are concerned).
Btw, the MBTI is a fully recognized test in "The world of Psychology" ( I hate to use such a cliche`, but I find myself with no other way of getting my meaning across easily, and I am rather sleepy atm ^^; ). Do a search on it, you'll see what I mean. The full test has something like 300+ Questions on it, can take up to two hours, and is generally administered by someone trained on it (I've taken the full version several times, it can cost *UP TO* $200, but Anything over $100 is either price gouging, or comes with a bunch of "Counseling" you probably don't need, and you can find it for as cheap as $50 if you know where to look), but you can find watered down versions on the net. Be careful though, some of the watered down versions aren't reliable. If I can find one Ill post the URL.
I would also like to say that there are people that know where you've been, just from hearing certain bits of information about you. And most people are capable of doing this, but not many are capable of seeing through, or even interested in seeing through, a mask of lack of information. Understanding comes with information, lack of information breeds a lack of understanding, even if someone else is interested in learning about someone or something. Of course, personal Experience similar to someone else makes relating to that person easier, but thats not to say understanding of someone dissimilar is impossible. Thats of course what Empathy is all about. Placing oneself in anothers shoes and intentionally trying to experience things they do. Though I will definitely agree that NOTHING is more annoying as having someone say that they understand you when they clearly do not..... That will drive me up a wall as well ^^.
"2"
Why do you feel like a moron? What did you mix up?
Not only would I agree with Rain about whining, I would go farther. Making a comment about "Whining" is a comparison. Its one person stating that for whatever their reason, they seem to be weaker then them. Ya know what? Some people are weaker then others in certain areas.... Just like some people are stronger then others in certain areas.... Now, excessive whining I will say does get abit bothersome after awhile, but theres nothing wrong in my book in informing someone that might be interested to know that what you're doing atm isn't your cup of tea..... And as such, don't expect it to have the results of something that you would feel better, or perhaps more capable, of doing. Of course, knowing when to "whine" and when not to, or at least when its in your best interest not to (Such as when you're trying to improve yourself in some way), is a very important thing to learn ^^. However, I won't say I've seen any excessive whining since I've been here IMHO.
I would also again like to point out that there are many reasons why people become loners. Introversion certainly seems to be quite a common reason, and maybe you are. Certainly if you choose to be alone more often then not on your own, with out influence on the decision from outside forces, then yes you probably are Introverted (And there is CERTAINLY NOTHING wrong with that, I am an Introvert, and a Loner by Choice, just to clarify where Im coming from), but there are other reasons why people become loners, and perhaps one of those other reasons fits you better. If introversion is the most common reason for becoming a Loner, then Social Exclusion (IE Outcasts) are a close 2nd. The reasons for being an outcast are as numerable as there are Minority Opinions, and anyone willing to live that Minority Opinion out in the open instantly becomes an Outcast. If there are none, or very few, others like them, they hence become what everyone else would refer to as a Loner, because they have no one to make a group with...... Same with my earlier example of a Serial Killer, except its been my experience they're usually loners of choice out of fear, and/or at the least convenient lack of possibility, of discovery...... The possible reasons, and combinations there of, for being the way we are, are as numerous as there are people on the planet... and considering the Estimated World population last I knew was somewhere above 6 Billion...... Yea...... That should say it all right there......
/sigh, I had more typed up, but accidently deleted all the rest (I periodically Copy and paste bits of posts as I go just in case, alas, this was all I had saved. /sigh)... And Im too sleepy to type it all out again atm. Perhaps tomorrow.... /sigh
Falcus